Yesterday I was wiped out. I was more exhausted than when walking the Camino. Who knew that cycling a few dozen kms and a session of Bikram would destroy me like that? I slept all day Sunday… No Bikram. With hindsight, I’m very glad I didn’t go. I obviously needed a rest day! My wonderful friend Eve encouraged me to do so on Facebook:
Rosie, achievement is not just about running around completing tasks. Rest and relaxation is ‘achieving’ something too. It sounds like you find it harder to allow yourself to let go than to keep going which means that resting is definitely a challenge, and it’s equally important for you to achieve balance and give your body time for restoration and rejuvenation. Not to mention your soul dude! 🙂 x
Essential advice. Love you Eve.
Today’s Bikram class was packed. I’d never seen the room so full — because of it being a public holiday, there were only a few classes today and there must have been maybe 60 people in there. Because I got in so late, I had to set myself up right at the front, facing the mirror, which meant I was sandwiched in between some of the Bikram stars who can contort themselves into insane postures. I got dizzy a few times, because I’d forgotten to eat lunch before coming, so I got to sit out some postures and just gaze at the pipecleaner twisting happening next to me. After class I happened to be standing next to the bendiest girl in the changing room, so I summoned my courage and said “It was awesome being next to you, you’re so good, it’s really inspirational.” and she sort of smiled tightly and said thanks before turning away, but really… why does everyone who does Bikram have such a stick up their arse? Nobody ever smiles, nobody ever acknowledges how good other people are — I witness some incredible contortion in that room! — and I get that you shouldn’t need validation from other people in your practice, but how about a little bit of friendliness and genuine admiration?
There is in fact one teacher who does encourage us to be more human. Susan is one of the owners of the studio and whilst most of the teachers are pleasant enough, she made me happy the other day when she suggested that when we go into locust pose, we all smile great big smiles and see how much higher off the ground we get. This did make a change from my usual look of pain and suffering and frowning, red-faced, sweaty determination. But that was the exception to the otherwise grim-faced rule.