It’s been over a week! What did I do? Well I finished the essay and submitted it on Sunday night. Then I had a workweek jampacked with what some might call stress, but luckily I was able to squeeze in lots of Bikram to make up for all I missed last week. Oh and I had a “touch-up” on my hair-cut and now it finally is looking how I want it to!
Today I was particularly lucky. I couldn’t drag myself out of bed for Bikram at 5am — ok, I didn’t even try, just rolled over and went back to sleep — so I worked 8:45am to 7:20pm, ran straight out my office onto the #1 tram, was fortunate enough that the #96 was just arriving when I changed at Swanston and Bourke, and arrived at Bikram at 7:50! Just in time for a really good, strong 8pm class. I’ve been enjoying morning classes to start my day all week, but evening classes are such a nice way to end a Friday night. Ok, it probably doesn’t sound that fun, laying all sweaty in a stinky room at 10 o’clock at night, just letting every stress of the week go… but I feel really good.
Tomorrow is Saturday… and I’m at school all day! Lucky me, I’m doing a course for students “returning to study”. I don’t know how much I need it, I hope it’s not a waste of my precious time off, but I’m not too confident about what the University of Melbourne expects of me as a postgrad so I thought I might as well go.
So I guess this blog could be re-named “Work Study Bikram” as there isn’t much else happening. But I’m happy. I am aware that I probably sound like such a new-age hippy when I start extolling the virtues and merits of Bikram… but I can feel how different a person I am now, especially at work — my boss was in my face screaming about my campaign and I was able to just breathe and stay calm, and try and calm him down too by reassuring him that everything is under control. Which it is — but his anxiety used to be so contagious that in the olden days I would just start crying and screaming back at him and doubting myself and my work.
When I worked for David in Taiwan this time last year, he told me over and over that my positivity and encouragement helped him face what seemed at times like an insurmountable, impossible task (but we did it! woohoo!). I really want to bring that to my current boss, despite his hysterical tendencies; I think deep down, even if he doesn’t acknowledge it, he does just want to hear that everything is going to be ok. I’m a superficially negative person — I complain A LOT! — but it’s generally meant to be entertaining rather than a real cahier de doléances. Bikram has made me so much stronger emotionally, and I really hope that my boss will benefit from the fact that I no longer yell at him and break down in tears… who knows, maybe he’ll stop yelling so much too.
In fact the only thing that’s made me cry in a long time is this. I had to stop watching as I was on the tram on my way to work and it was not a good time to start bawling… And nope, no real logical explanation why art+music (even when sponsored by ING) make me so emotional — but I suppose it’s good to know I still have irrational feelings!